three years ago when I started to work on a story of a male sexual assault victim i was unawre of many aspects of this huge issue. In my young mind, when some one raises their voice and say " i was sexually assaulted" regardless of their race, gender, age or beliefs, they would be met with compassion. But this is the real world, and the real world does not understand what its like to be subjected to the worst of all violations and then be faced with disbelief and rejection. even from the ones who might think the best of you, there is still a sense of questioning and disbelief. then a cycle of self blame and confusion starts to take over you as you starts asking yourself why? why me? why did I not do this or that? why am I the one being questioned? I did not do anything wrong ? did I? did I do something wrong? Do I even deserve to be believed? Do I even deserve compassion? am I really the victim? often the times sexual assault survivors feel like they are alone, like they have been forcefully removed from the world, they become isolated as they disatnt themselves from the gaze of others who might or might not know. the shame grows stronger everytime they go back to what had happened. and they can not just LET IT GO. as many might tell them, believe me they have tried. but the trauma is the master of a wounded soul, it takes over your dreams and turns them into nightmares, waking up drenched and shivering from a sleep that started out peaceful, one you have not had in so long before it turned to reliving the worst thing that youe ever exprienced. the rape culture tends to focus on the assault, on the characteristics that fits the preptrators. No one really care or knows the suffering endured by the survivors long after the assault. they have been murdered and have been stuck at a loop, reliving their death every single day, as they reinvent themselves. And the question is : What have we got to offer them? How do we help them? we can start by understanding that the so called reason for doubt that might come to mind whenever someone reaches out to us and share with us what had happened with them, that so called reason for doubt, that make the assault seem impossible, that reason is mere ignorance, that stems from the fact that what have been made known about rape is nothing but a shallow understatement of a serious issue. it may come as a surprise to many that most research done in regards of sexual assault had been done in blindspots. and the statstics often misinform in such an issue where more than the many never report their cases due to millions of different factors. what can you do? GET INVOLVED. RESEARCH, READ, REACH OUT TO SURVIVORS, LISTEN TO THE ONES WHO SHARED THEIR STORIES, DO NOT LET IGNORANCE LEAD YOU. YOU, I , THEY ..... WE DESERVE MORE THAN THAT.
